Choosing Presence Over Perfection in Motherhood

Motherhood is an endless series of choices—some small, like what’s for breakfast, and some monumental, like how to shape the hearts and minds of tiny little humans. It’s easy to get swept up in the chaos, reacting rather than intentionally responding. 

Intentional living in motherhood isn’t about following a perfect routine or curating an Instagram-worthy childhood. It’s about making conscious choices that align with your values, embracing the season you’re in, and loving your children (and yourself) with intention.

With all the noise of parenting advice, societal expectations, and personal guilt, it’s easy to feel like we should be doing everything. But ask yourself: What truly matters? Is it creating a peaceful home? Raising kind children? Making time for creative play? Focus on those core values and let the rest fall away. 

Be Present, Not Perfect

There’s a difference between being physically with your kids and being fully present. Intentionally choose presence over perfection. It’s sitting on the floor and really listening to their stories instead of multitasking. It’s slowing down for bedtime snuggles even when the to-do list is calling. Your presence—is what they’ll remember.

Simplify Where You Can

The weight of motherhood often comes from the sheer volume of stuff—both physically and mentally. Simplify where possible: declutter the toys and let go of unrealistic expectations. When you create space, you allow room for what truly matters. 

Model the Life You Want Them to Live

Children learn more from what we do than what we say. If we want them to be kind, patient, and present, we must embody those qualities ourselves. Show them what it looks like to prioritize relationships over busyness, to rest without guilt, and to pursue joy in everyday moments. 

Make Time for Yourself, Too

This has been such a challenge for me after having my daughter, but I am beginning to understand and embody that taking care of me is also taking care of the ones I love so dearly. Taking care of your mind, body, and soul isn’t selfish—it’s necessary. When you nurture yourself, you have more to give. Whether it’s an early morning cup of coffee in silence, a walk in the fresh air, or a creative outlet, prioritize what fills you up. 

 

Embrace the Messy, Beautiful Reality

Some days are chaotic, exhausting, and overwhelming. But when we approach motherhood with purpose—choosing connection over control, presence over perfection—we create a life that is deeply fulfilling, for both us and our children. It’s okay to have a dance party with dishes in the sink. 

At the end of the day, your child won’t remember if the laundry was folded or if dinner was organic. They’ll remember how you made them feel—safe, loved, and seen. And that’s the most intentional gift you can give.

 

Love you, mean it.